The message tonight really spoke to me and has me thinking and smiling to myself so I have to share.
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
-from Psalm 23
There were so many layers to reading and discussing these short phrases tonight. Whether you are religious or not, I think that this message of peace and patience is so important, especially in my age group.
Tonight we talked about things that I want to remember and repeat back to myself as I ease into this transition and settle in. I want to think of the road that led me here in this way also:
~lie down~how often do i take the time to be still and just lie down with my thoughts? Are there times when I can, but instead I turn up the volume and put my headphones in so I don't have to think or worry about X, Y, or Z? I want to make myself balance and stop to think more often.
~makes me....green pastures~thinking of this green pasture as wherever you have been put, do we sometimes end up in a pasture we don't want to be in? Are there times when we have to stick it out so that we can learn something or serve a purpose in a "pasture" we never thought we would have ended up in?
I definitely have been feeling like Savannah was a pasture I lived in for a while where I was always looking over the fence at the lush offerings on the other side. But, while you sometimes think that you know what you need, it often times might turn out that you needed what you didn't want. I learned so much there about myself, teaching, all of the time trying to find love, and was in such a hurry to get out of there, but realized in the months before I left how much love was there. Loves like these:
What other pastures come to mind? Certainly jobs I have had in the past where I might have felt frustrated but not realized that the people I worked for were learning from me, or knowing that they taught me things I still use today.
This talk reminded me of Elizabeth Gilbert and her musings on spiritual growth, change, and self-discovery. I have gobs of her quotes saved and love to reread them.
The other problem is...you are never where you ARE. You are always digging in the past or poking at the future, but rarely do you rest in this moment...There's a reason they call God a presence - because God is right here, right now. In the present is the only way to find Him, and now is the only time.
In the end, I’ve come to believe in something I call “The Physics of the Quest.” A force in nature governed by laws as real as the laws of gravity. The rule of Quest Physics goes something like this: If you’re brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting, which can be anything from your house to bitter, old resentments, and set out on a truth-seeking journey, either externally or internally, and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher and if you are prepared, most of all, to face and forgive some very difficult realities about yourself, then the truth will not be withheld from you.
And the newly found singledom I am embracing everyday is certainly one of many pastures I am crossing through on my quest. I am learning to spread out my picnic blanket, take off my sandals so my feet can feel the soft grass. I might put down my sword and lay on my back so that the sun hits the freckles on my nose. I might want to jump over the fence into dating from time to time, but I will sit and lie down in my pasture for as long as I need to. Who knows? There might be a cute boy in the right place at the right time... in a neighboring field who needs someone to keep him company on his blanket. Together we will be footloose and fancy free.
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